Sure thing — here goes:
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So, there I was, stumbling across some random game update news, figuring, why not jot it down? I’ve always loved diving into weirdly fascinating gaming stuff, and guess what? Studio Wildcard, the brains behind Ark: Survival Ascended, just tossed something from left field. They’re adding this prehistoric weirdo called Helicoprion. I mean, a shark with a buzzsaw jaw? Wild, right? Anyway, they’re mixing in more player-made content for ARK, which hit Early Access… when was it? October 2023, I think.
Speaking of time — no idea how we’re already plowing through 2025. I’ve literally lost track. Oh, and about that game, they’ve been slapping on updates left, right, and center. Remember v68.34? Well, it’s not like you have to, but it patched up stuff like frame rates during those pesky sandstorms, not to mention a million other bugs players moaned about. Can’t imagine playing a game that stutters like a broken record.
Anyway — wait, was I talking about… Ah, right, the Helicoprion. Catchy name, huh? This aquatic oddball is coming straight from a fan-favorite mod by some user named Garuga123. Now that’s a name! And in case you’re wondering if this buzzsaw beast is a player-hunter — nope, it’s into Ammonite, whatever that is. Sounds like the kind of creature that just chills unless you poke it. Oh, and they’re tweaking it for its new pixelated home. Yep, your crafters might get a kick out of its crazy jaw or something.
And we’re expecting it on August 20, 2025. Soon, right? Free for everyone — neat, right? With its chilled vibe, you could use it to explore those deep waters. Breeding? Maybe. It’s not clear yet — I mean, if you can tame it, why not breed it too?
But hey, there’s more. Ragnarok transfers — that’s happening on August 15. Move your digital goodies around without a hitch. Temporary servers named “Expire” popping up too, available until September 1. They sound like burner phones, don’t they? Search “Expire” if you’re in-game.
And let’s talk promises. Studio Wildcard threw out a roadmap earlier this year — more free creatures are set to roll out. Valguero Ascended? Coming soon. And then, more “Fantastic Tame” creatures in 2026. Is it just me, or is this game turning into a digital Jurassic Park?
Anyway, I better wrap this up before I lose all sense of what I’m rambling about. Games, man. They’re keeping us on our toes.
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How’d I do?